In Conversation with Nathalie Pitters: Cinematographer
Fran: What is your background?
Nathalie: I actually went to two film schools. I went to the London Film School, when I had no experience in anything. I'd been a runner a couple of times. I knew I wanted to be a DOP, but I didn't have a clue how to go about doing that. And the first time I was a runner, I tried to speak to the DOP, who very kindly offered to take me for a coffee and talk through it all. I felt so self-conscious at first, because I didn't know anything and I thought any question I'd ask him I'd just sound like an idiot. So I never got in touch with him to actually take him up on his offer. Then I moved to Tokyo for four years to be an English teacher. Not for film reasons, completely separate, I just wanted to live abroad. It was one of the best experiences in my life. I was there from age 24 to 28, which is the best time to be living abroad. Then I had to move home for various reasons and I thought, this is probably a good chance to even attempt this ‘film thing’. So I went to film school and I left there with a really nice basic grounding on what everyone does on set and little bit about how a camera works. And then I just started freelancing as much as I could. I still had a full-time office job to pay my bills, but on the weekends or on sick days or annual leave days, I was on all the job boards sending my CV out to be a camera assistant, or a gaffer, or a DP, or anything to do with camera and lighting. I ended up getting pretty busy with that. When you apply for jobs online, most of the time you’re not successful, but I then found out that more and more, I actually was getting the jobs. When I was getting jobs as DOP, they were all very low budget. I don't think I got paid for the first eighteen months.
Nonetheless, I was excited. I borrowed my friend's camera, I borrowed another friend's lights, another friend's lenses. I ran around London, getting it all together, and then I'd turn up and I'd shoot. Panalux also very kindly gave me off-cuts of gels that they had. I was just learning how to tell stories visually with the little resources that I had. At that time, I wasn't at all picky. I really just wanted opportunities to do anything and everything, and I just cut my teeth on it. Soon enough I was able to build a show reel and then that show reel got a little bit better, and then the next one got a little bit better. A friend of mine was directing music videos, so he got me on a few of them.
Photo courtesy of Nathalie Pitters
Everything was going pretty well, but I felt there was something missing from my work. I was figuring out what lenses I liked, what lights and everything, but it all felt very surface. I wanted to get more into the story. So, I applied to NFTS, not thinking I'd get in, and that was that was probably one of the best decisions I made. It was a difficult decision, because at the time when I started the course, I was actually starting to get a lot of work and I had to decide if I wanted to press pause on my work and go off for two years to do this programme. Ultimately, it was the best decision.
Fran: Why did you decide to start off as a runner? Did you know that that was a good way of getting into the film business?
Nathalie: I think it was 2008 when I did my first job as a runner. I basically Googled 'How do you become a Cinematographer?' All of the articles said, 'Start at the bottom and be a runner. Then be a camera trainee, then be a camera assistant.' And in my head, I was thinking, 'OK this looks like it will be a twenty year freaking process, but I'll do it! I'll just do it.' On my first few films as a runner, I just stalked the DOP. I was like 'What's he doing? Why is he doing that? What's that orange thing he's carrying all the time? Why is the light blue?' I was so curious about everything, but I didn't want to ask because I didn't want to look stupid. I just tried to absorb as much as I could. Around the same time, I was also working at film festivals. Anything that had the word film in it, I'd try and be there in some way. While I was at a film festival handing out flyers, I got chatting to someone else who was handing out flyers, who'd just come back from Japan where she had been teaching English. I had always wanted to travel there and she said it was surprisingly easy to get a job as an English teacher. I thought I'd go there for a year and then I'll come back and do this filmmaking thing. I had downloaded the applications for film school in 2008, but I ended up going much later, because I stayed in Japan for four years. While I was there, I knew I wanted to be a DOP, but I was too scared to even make videos on my phone or on my DSLR, because I thought if these videos don't come out looking like a Bond film, then that means I'm not destined to be a DOP. I set incredibly high expectations for myself.
Fran: If you could tell me in one sentence, what it is that you love about being a DOP?
Nathalie: I love telling stories from different perspectives. That's what it always boils down to.
Fran: Has Covid affected your work?
Nathalie: In March, last year, I did one job, and then in April and May, I did nothing. Then in the middle of June, I started working again and I haven't stopped since. It sounds really bad, but I actually think I've never been busier in my life than I have this year.
Fran: Has Covid refocused your life somehow?
Nathalie: It definitely did. For those three months I wasn't working, or seeing my boyfriend, or any of my friends. I was just at home the whole time and occasionally going out for a really long walk. And that's something that I haven't done ever. I've never had that time off ever, certainly not since I started doing film. I've always been doing two things. I've always been at film school and shooting on the weekends, or I've been doing a boring admin job to pay the bills then shooting on a weekend, or going to NFTS and shooting on the weekend. Over the first lockdown was the first time that I really had time to think. It can be very tempting to just take all the jobs, because you're getting paid. It's cool to be working all the time and playing with new equipment. But I realised that a lot of the jobs that I was doing, they just weren't exciting for me. I had kind of lost sight of what it is that I actually wanted to do, and I was just doing stuff because it was being offered to me. When lockdown first ended and we were able to work again, initially I took all the jobs I could to build up my bank account, but then I really tried to be more selective about what projects I took. It really became a creative passion again.
Photo courtesy of Nathalie Pitters
Fran: How do you look after your mental health?
Nathalie: It's hard because I don't. I'm so used to overworking. That's why over the first lockdown was the first chance I got to actually breathe. I probably sleep like five hours a night, because I'm emailing, I'm on my phone, I'm trying to find references. I feel like I can't not do it, I can't not reply. I can't just ignore people.
Fran: Do you think there is a culture of a self-sacrificial attitude in our industry?
Nathalie: Yeah, I think there is. I think especially for women, because we're trying to prove ourselves. When you do get opportunities, you have to prove that you're just as good as the guy they hired last time. You can't just be equal, you have to be better, so you have to always be available. It's also stressful because you're never just doing one project, especially as a freelancer. You're constantly working, even when you're not working. I think last month I was prepping or filming five projects at once, so I'm getting emails and WhatsApp group messages from all of them. I'm so used to it now, I don't get as stressed out, but I need to be better. I love getting emails, because it means I'm busy and I like being busy, and I like that I get to work on all these cool projects. But being in lockdown, I could just let my mind breathe for a minute.
Fran: You used the Cooke Classic Speed Pancro lenses for one of your music videos. What made you choose those lenses?
Nathalie: We wanted a classic look that wasn't too clean and not too sterile and clinical. I have a couple of favorite lenses and they are always at the top. I really love the skin tones on them. I really like the focus fall off. I really love everything about them. The color scheme on that music video was very warm pinks and cool blues. It was nice to have that contrast as well.
To watch Natalie's music video Griff "Mirror Talk* and her production break down click here
Fran: Do you think the industry is doing enough to encompass diversity and inclusion?
Nathalie: I think on the surface the industry is doing enough. I think deep down, probably not. I think partly it's because everyone thinks someone else is going to do something. The director thinks the producer is going to do something, and the producer thinks the Exec is going to do something, and the Exec thinks the label's going to do something and, actually, it never filters down. Also, a lot of the people at the very top are still white, and mostly white men. I think it's tricky because on these 'diversity' or 'gender equality' lists of crew members or creative, there are only a few names that are recognisable. And those people are usually unavailable, because they're always working. Consequently, the Exec is like 'Oh well, we tried, didn’t we?' And then they move on and hire the white guy they always book. People just need to learn more names.
Fran: Do you think that people might be scared to make changes, and then be criticized for getting it wrong?
Nathalie: It could be. Maybe they want to make sure everything is perfect before inviting that kind of criticism. For example, maybe people are worried about hiring a BAME person to shoot a really low budget music video, because they don't want to be seen as exploiting that person. But at the same time, it's worth giving the opportunity and it's up to them say no if they want. Because let's face it, everyone has shot that terrible, no-budget music video. The film industry is one of these industries where you can't get a job until you've had a job. Which makes sense, because if my first job had been shooting The Crown, that would have been awful, I would have been terrible. But then, people don't seem to have a problem taking a chance on a white male DOP who's maybe early in their career. I don't know where it comes from. It might be a subconscious thing. I struggle with that a lot. There are some directors and some producers where I know they're only hiring me because they want high production value for very little money. But then actually, when they get the big bucks, they go somewhere else.
Fran: Very often women get hired only on their credentials, but men get hired on their potential.
Nathalie: That's very true. I want 2021 to be the first time that I get to do something long-form, but because I have mostly music videos, commercials and short form on my CV, I usually get passed over for those types of jobs.
Fran: If you weren't a cinematographer, what would your other job be?
Nathalie: Photojournalist. I still want to be one. I want to be part of Magnum, that's my next goal. It's an insane goal, but it will probably never happen. I don't take enough photos and I don't dedicate my life to it the way you have to. I get very obsessed with little details when I go to new places, but I think the problem is I can't see those details here in the UK. I was born in London and I've been here my whole life (apart from the years in Tokyo), so I don't have to think when I go places. When I was in Tokyo, I had to pay attention to the little details - the language, the public transportation, the super market… Until I can start to see the beautiful details of London, I don't think I'll be a successful photojournalist, because you need to be able to see them everywhere, not just when you're on safari or in a cool city.
Fran: What piece of advice would you give to women right now?
Nathalie: Don't let anyone hold you back and don’t second guess yourself. I’ve often felt like I have to put other people’s needs or feelings before my own, or temper my words and actions so I don’t appear too harsh or bossy. And I think that's a really dangerous internalised misogyny that we need to get rid of. Owning your own decisions and feeling confident with yourself is so important.
Nathalie is a member of Sporas, Illuminatrix Rising and is currently rep’d by Worldwide Production Agency. Her work can be viewed here: https://www.nathaliepitters.com/
#shotoncooke https://shotoncooke.com/video/griff-mirror-talk/
This is a sponsored feature article by Cooke Optics as part of our ongoing support of female talent in the camera department.
